"Now you're talking about your self. All anybody fucking cares about is themselves. Even me, especially me. Me! This is me! I'm a boy in a dress, this...concept that's totally fucking trivial and stupid, and yet loaded with hatred to most everybody, and yet it's all I am. That's it. Everything else about me is predicated on this idea of a boy in a dress. And I'm sick of it. And nobody will ever understand except other boys in dresses, who are as self-obsessed as I am. I'm so sick of being human.. Me, timid little Zoe Zola, the last one on the register at school who always had to wait for everyone else to be called before she could say anything. I know my married name is further up the register but you don’t get married at school do you, and the damage is done by then. Zoe Zero was my nickname, always last. It’s weird really, I mean why should a security system that you can’t see make you feel safe, but somehow if I knew that no one was looking then I could do what I wanted; like look. What the hell was she doing?And just at that moment, more people started to arrive. Apparently, they didn't care about knocking. Within the next several minutes, my Ex's apartment was flooded with people. I tried to keep up with the influx of bodies, but my drink tray was always empty.No one really cared that I was really a guy dressed up like a maid. Half the people were drunk on arrival and probably thought I really was a girl. Several guys grabbed my ass as I walked by with the empty drink. Back then, there wasn't the cheap sort of package holidays around that are readily available now so she had paid for it out of 'her' money. Again I didn't mind, all my spare cash was going into our home so if we wanted a holiday, she had to pay. We stayed at a quite posh hotel in Barcelona, close to all the vibrant night-life and glorious beaches that wonderful city had to offer. We had become friendly with another couple our age that we'd met in the hotel bar on our first night there. At first.
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